EXECUTIVE OR EMOTIONAL
As school leaders, we know that we arise each morning with the best intentions of being in our best leadership state of mind, initiating, motivating, and solving the issues of the day with the wisdom and experience of a seasoned educator. But as an experienced educator, we also have likely experienced—more often than we may dare to admit—how we can become quickly unraveled, becoming reactive rather than proactive, talking or yelling more than listening, and feeling our ego drop as our blood pressure rises.
In Becky Baily’s book, Conscious Discipline, she describes how we can find ourselves in one of two possible states. We can find ourselves in the reactional, Emotional state which reacts from the limbic system of our brain. It is here where we feel anger and frustration taking its toll on our “A game.” We can also find ourselves in the Executive state, which is our optimal level or efficiency and proactive alertness. In Executive State we can function with objectivity, seeing and responding to issues with clarity and empathy.
Of course, we always intend to be leaders that remain in Executive state but unless we are keenly aware, we can be switched to Emotional state by the words and actions of others, causing us to lead or conduct ourselves in less than optimal and preferred ways. We learn how to unconsciously pretend to be in Executive state by being calm on the outside, smiling our tense, painted on smile, while our muscles are tightening and we are internally brooding.
In order to be at our best for all or most of our day, we first need to check in with ourselves and become more self-aware of which state we are in and to take necessary steps to get ourselves back to the preferred Executive state when we sense the breaker has switched off to the Emotional state default.
In order to have more time maintaining executive functioning, we first have to take care of ourselves, getting enough sleep, water, and personal pleasure time (whatever you do to relax).
Getting in your exercise, meditation, and/or prayer can serve as a strong anchor for much of your day. So, do not ignore the most important person: YOU!
Another way to switch to the Executive state is to plan to do your important work first to build a sense of accomplishment early in the day. Make the rounds and connect with teachers and students. Plan an exciting venture or professional development program, listen or read an inspiring and educational article that you can put into good use.
Another idea to help you stay Executive, is to get your assistants and support staff to handle as much of the minutiae as possible, and to protect your time from tasks and issues that can be easily delegated to others.
Make a set time each day, usually midday, to either close your door to take deep relaxing breathes or close your eyes for a bit, or to do something distracting for a few minutes. Make sure to eat your lunch and to drink water throughout the day. Nothing can switch your Executive off easier than going hungry or dehydrated. Even better is to take a break walking outside the confines of the school building where you can reset and refocus for the remainder of the day.
Having a confidant, in or out of school, to whom you can bounce issues and challenges, can be a useful “release and refocus” opportunity. I also have found that, to the extent possible, leave the school at school, and resist bringing the day’s issues and frustrations to your home to air out to your family. Resist checking your school emails or website, if it can be avoided.
Most critical is the awareness and self-reflection you, as school leader, can practice and model for others. When you feel switched to Emotional, retire to your office or get outside for a few minutes to reground, and rebound to your optimal Executive state.
